Tuesday, March 18, 2014

:|D


Let me tell you something about people who think they are gorgeous. Or glamorous. Or any of that. They all have something in common. THEY’VE BEEN TOLD!

Campaigns go berserk, and magazines promote articles, even parents, make sure that every child, or every grown up knows that they look lovely. That they are lovely. Which is true. This truth however, is disguised in the name of irony… for every child is born innocent. Fat. Thin. Lanky. Queer. Regular. The categories vary, but they are all born clueless…after which the unattractive get teased, the chiseled get praised, the fat get prodded and the lanky get shoved with bowlfuls of food. Even the regular get stereotyped as boring. As for the queer, let’s just not even go there.

Though you may misconstrue me for a cynic after the above paragraph, I care to disagree. This is genuinely the way of the world, and it does not beat me that the people who are conventionally attractive, are extremely confident (COS THEY’VE BEEN TOLD). Keeping up with the Jones’s has become a cosmetic reality and though I deeply appreciate constructive criticism and compliments per say, take it easy small world! You might not like the way someone does their eyebrows, or braids their hair, or is overweight, and the freedom of expression is all yours. To obsess on this flaw which is apparent to you however, may curtail someone else’s similar freedom, one that I’d like to call originality. To be concerned about one’s health is one thing, but to use it as an excuse for mockery, another. To tease is one thing, to torment, another. Tangible as the flaw may be, such impulse on your part, might scar an intangible part of someone else’s personality.
Try if you may- compliment with warmth, listen with grace, critique with mercy and look beyond the picture. What you see, is if not always, seldom, what you get. Give people benefit of the doubt; give beauty the justice it deserves.

Phew! That was deep. For my shallow standards at least!
However, this does, as you may imagine, come with a story.



This was the picture I uploaded on facebook around last month. I’m not much of a facebooker, but thought it was rather cute, would suffice as a profile picture for recognition, and boasted of the first dog show I’d been to, which was a ball.
The 30 second upload(slow 3G), left me miserable in a days’ time.

  WHY?
  My GUMS were on display!

  WHY?
 Cos it was an extremely happy, candid moment caught on camera.

I was hurt at first, and cringed to delete the picture, a move my ego did not appreciate. While a couple of likes popped by, around a dozen of my friends pinged, asking me to take off the atrocious gummy bear. They called the dog the saving grace of the picture. The catch- I knew the dog was adorable but hadn’t even noticed my gums before. High school came crashing down on me in my 20’s. When I hit rock bottom- When my relatives called my mother, asking her to take off my picture – “ What if a prospective groom sees it Jaya?”. –INSANE!

I’d like to think of myself as a rational person, but my fuse had been blown. The bestest of my friends consoled me saying surgery was an option and they knew some place well- known for gum contouring. My parents  on the other hand, skimmed my matrimony site to make sure I was smiling ‘”slightly and pleasantly” in all the pictures. No offence cos I love them all , but I didn’t know I was AS flawed till this stoooopid profile picture. I always knew my gums could be seen and was often teased for the same. My sister called it the Mona-without-Lisa-Smile (Mona meaning gums in my native), but never did I recognize it to be that big a deal. Was it that I never realized that I was unconsciously displaying a fugly smile? Or was it that the world around me just raised their expectations by large? I was never a supermodel, but do I look like a monster?

Which is when I did what most people do. I googled.

On gums, and pigmentation and gums, and surgery.

And I felt happy (some people say people with gummy smiles come off as genuine)

And then I felt sad (cos someone said gummy smiles are unattractive and horse-like)

And happy (Jennifer Garner, Cobie Smulders,  Kalki Koechin -grin)

And then sad (PEOPLE are creep-ed out by gummy smiles!).

This exercise went on for a while:
The anti-climax- me considering whether to go for surgery.
The climax- Deciding against it because I was afraid. Not of the cosmetologist by the corner, but of losing a part of my personality with my natural smile.

This part of my monologue is very personal, for surgery or not would be an individualistic thing.
At long last I decided to stick with my gummy smile. I realized that every ecstatic moment in my life had been captured with these gummies. I realized that my favorite teacher, whom I loved the most, had a gummier smile than mine. I realized that every photograph where my gums were missing was backed by a fake moment. 
I realized that subconsciously, my fuglyy gums had become part of beautiful me.

And that  I HAD NOT BEEN TOLD.

The profile picture stays.

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Women.Women.Women..

INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY has hit the road! Flyers, banners, campaigns and slogans clog the net and beyond, as we at scribbledabble wish you from our side as well!

This year, we urge women and girls to not conform to que sera sera(Whatever will be, will be). What 2014 and beyond demands, especially from the ladies, is gumption to voice you beliefs, and to not be overtaken by influence. From a voice that is neither feminist, nor chauvinistic, SPEAK for equality, ACT for progress., and WORK with pride. 

If your manager at your white collar job asks you to make him coffee, VOICE it. If your unsatisfied with your work, MOVE out. If you deserve the promotion, FIGHT for it. If you feel like studying, ENROLL. If you’re in love, PROPOSE. And if you want to be a stay at home mom, TAKE that step, with PRIDE.

There is this documentary by the name of GULAABI GANG running in Indian theaters today, where only 125 of the 900 female members of a women’s right activist movement in a constituency, vote for their own needs, in context. Do NOT succumb to social stigma, like the 775 others. At least TRY. Your MIND is YOUR own. You can sport a tattoo, reveal some skin, or run a country- as long as you want to. We cannot change our lives in a fortnight, or perhaps even in a decade, which is why the TINY steps. For 2014, BELIEVE in yourself, and let your actions speak for your BELIEFs. In this world of toll-free numbers by the hour, HYPOCRISY is our greatest threat.
As for the men, LOVE us, like we love you. Its as simple as it gets.






--FEW CUSTOMs TO BE ABOLISHED THIS WOMEN’s DAY--

  • HEROINE - the word

Every time a HERO COMES ALONG(music lead!) an image of a man hits your head. Yet, most people quote their mother’s to be their HEROs. Which, pardon me if I’m wrong, defies the existence of the for-name-sake "HEROINE". Why not dispose the word at large?!
  •  The EXIT symbol.

(The single running man is sooo OUT)
  •   Miss-Ms-Mr-?

If Miss – is for an unmarried woman, Mrs- for a married one, and Mr. For a man. Funny that being married is not discretion enough for a title, at least not a popular one!
Abolish the Mrs or bring in a Master I say!
  •  MASCULINE PROVERBs(scowl)


 “He who hesitates is lost.”
( At which “She” who hesitates is probably thinking, but that's no excuse for a generic proverb!)

And there are more-
- “He that walketh with the wise, shall be wise: a friend of fools shall become like to them”.
- “He that complies against his will, is of the same opinion still.”
- “He who troubles his own house shall inherit the wind.”

-“He” who’s familiar with proverbs –subconscious ego-boost.
  • (IGNORING) NOVEMBER 19th.meh.

 Most lay-people are caught unaware of the existence of the INTERNATIONAL MEN’s DAY as such. And what a shame that it is!. This WOMEN’s day, the cry is not only for us women, but for the strong men who have stood by us, while so many have tried to stamp us down. Thank you for that! We look forward to celebrating the men who are pillars of our world, and cannot wait for the 19 of November!


Tuesday, March 4, 2014

On Oscars and Life Lessons!!



In a rather plagiarist-ic manner, common to the 10 best and top 20's that are circulating in the media of late(in particular), catch it and you must
-The top 10 Life Lessons from the 86th annual academy awards!
(Creative use of my visual aids while blogging if I may :P)

1. You are beautiful the moment you let yourself be.


This year, the red carpet was not adorned with conventional hoopla. The blaring appeal of fresh personality and charm, backed by the gleam of confidence was heart-warming, while the idea of displaying part of your true self, out and about, proved to be insanely attractive.


2. Women are in Power!


Cate Blanchet said it, and I'll say it again, 'female centric movies aren’t niche any more, audience want to see more of women, and they definitely rake in the moolah!'



Game on sister- you got that right!
Ps: I do not come from society where women are downtrodden, yet, at that, I felt assured, hopeful rather, that somewhere, someplace, these words might have left a girl motivated, and a boy enlightened.


3. The show must go on.




Leo was a star. Was. Is. and Will be. Point to be noted - while the media is screaming pity, and praise, of a man who hasn't won an Oscar, what outshines the fuss, is  not just a person who acts brilliantly, but an ACTOR, who has always outdone himself, in the skin of his characters. Howard Hughes, Jack Dawson, Billy,Cobb, Teddy Daniels, Frank William Abagnale and Jr. Jordan Belfort, we salute you all.


4. Gratitude reciprocates.


Alright Alright Alright :-P. The man of chick flick fame who waltzed into our hearts with his splendid performance in Dallas Buyer's Club, Matthew McConaughey spoke of God proving to him that it is a scientific fact that gratitude reciprocates. The words, though critiqued by a cynical few, gave me hope on a personal level.



Either way, me thinks it’s worth a bet, to not clutter my mental closet with words and deeds as the moment passes by.
Amen: good food for thought.


5. The roots that hold you down, set you to soar!



I love Jared Leto.(had to say that somewhere).
The humility displayed by all the nominees and winners on this particular Oscar night was almost tangible. Jared Leto, Matthew McConaughey, Steve Mc Queen, the list goes on, as do their thank yous. All the winners spoke not only with respect, but admiration and sheer gratitude, to their family and their counterparts. The shouts of endearment, from Jared Leto to Ukrainians and Venezuelans’ who are struggling to fulfill their aspirations, and to the 36 million people who have lost the battle to AIDS, from  Lupita Nyongo to her  character Patsey in the movie 12 years a slave, and from Steve Mc Queen  to all the people who have endured slavery (and the 21 million people who still suffer slavery today), left us touched, humbled, and painfully aware.


6. Selfies score!




The last time I remember, the nutter who made his own selfie his facebook profile picture, was tagged as a wannabe. Nuh-huh..not anymore! If you are having a moment, why wait, spread the joy for all I care!

7. Keep it simple silly.


Ellen was so carefree that I found myself thinking any of us, could be perfect celebrities, or hosts for that matter. No hassle, no fuss and pizza in plenty - a role I would play any day. Stuff it up Stuck ups! haha.


8. Your DOB means Nothing. Nothing.
(can't bring myself to use the 'A' word)


June Squibb  84, Bruce Dern 77, and Nebraska, just half an Oscar nominated year old. To add further flavor, the iconic Judi Dench (79) was nominated for best female actor, but could not attend the awards because she was away shooting the sequel to her movie. Tweaking the words of Lupita Nyongo,  ‘No matter where you’re from, or how old you are, your dreams are valid, and you must definitely NOT give up on them’


9. To Err is human, let’s take it divine.


Even the best of the best actors stumble with their lines! haha. Yes Zac Effron,Harrison Ford,even John Travolta stumble-mumbled! So give yourself a break -it’s absolutely Err to human!!(caught me didnt ya!). ‘Life knocks you down and its upto you to get back up’ -and who else better tell us how, than the adorable Jennifer Lawrence who was knocked down by the red carpet itself, and laughed it away. Now that’s what you call a sport, a gorgeous one at that!

10. Everyone deserves not just to survive, but to live


What a way to end the day! Words personified by the likes of Barkhad Abdi, and spoken by Mc Queen who said that in that moment the gap between the Dolby theater and the rest of humanity felt a little smaller #inspired. 



Friday, February 28, 2014

Chocolate and Raspberry Pancakes!!!



My love affair with pancakes has existed since forever. It was an all-time favourite in our household, everyone lingering by the kitchen, with my mum ‘The Ultimate Pancake Machine’, flipping away the most magnificent pancakes in the world!!!

With Pancake day just around the corner, I couldn’t have asked for a better time for my long awaited pancake post!!

Ps: duhh alert - Todays Menu reads ‘Chocolate and Raspberry Pancakes’


Ingredients
  
I cup Self Raising Flour
1 Egg
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. Vanilla Essence
1 cup Milk
4tbsp Sugar
2 tsp. Cocoa
150 gms Raspberry
A pinch of salt

Method

In a large bowl   sift the Flour, baking powder, cocoa and salt; slowly fold in the egg using a spatula or whisk.

Now gradually add small quantities of milk to this batter, whisking continuously till a smooth batter is formed. Blend in the sugar and the vanilla essence. Add the raspberries as well.

Take a pan and get it really hot, and then turn it down to medium heat. Slightly grease the pan with a bit of butter, to prevent the pancake from sticking to the pan. Scoop the batter using a big spoon or a ladle and pour it onto the pan in one go. The pancake should ideally take half a minute or so to cook on each side till it turns mocha brown, so keep flipping it now and again so as to prevent it from burning.

To serve sprinkle some icing sugar and fresh raspberries, or you can maybe even go extra chocolaty with some decadent chocolate sauce!!!(YUMMMMMMM!!!)



Friday, February 21, 2014

The Proposal!





 Scene1:  Spring 1988,Exterior.

I walked out in a semi-clad white nightdress, as the morning sun peeked in;  walked to my balcony, overlooking the Mediterranean where I was welcomed by breakfast. I gasped in joy, a tiny breathe held, at the sight of the feast that lay before me, and that of him. He was sitting on one of the wicker chairs in his linen shorts, eyebrow arching at my semi-nude appearance, on his open sunshade. Picking a croissant, I walked over and sat on his lap, as he wiped my hair from my face. There we sat, painting our picture of love. It was perfect. It was simple. It was us. He brought out the ring, a family heirloom  and said he loved me, for the second time loud, and asked me if I thought it was time. I smiled, and let go of my fourth finger. He was speaking, but I heard nothing as the antique slipped past my knuckles, falling right into place, leaving room for nothing but my first teary kiss.

Scene 2: Summer 1997,Location-The Concert.

He sings.  Not just the plain karaoke sing, but the Sting kinda sing. He's not much of a performer though, hence it is only during our personal conversations that last into the night that the music in him has surfaced. The first time I heard it, it was nothing short of dreamy, and hence I shall remember the way I looked that night(oh man!) as the years go by . Later, I kept nudging him to croon a little but he was so stubborn not to, that I finally let go, calling him a spoil sport. 
Well this is the setting. The proposal was a stunner. We had gone for a concert by an Indian troupe with good taste and before I knew it he was on stage, spotlight on, singing Bruno Mars' marry you. And a beautiful night it was! I meant to yelp in joy, while my Christian Grey inspired inner Goddess ran on stage held another mike and sang back in return performing the best duet and making out for the world to see, but even my imagination wouldn't take me that astray. I stood in the middle of the quadrangle, the red carpet leading right up to me, with candles and white roses on either side. He was still singing as he walked up to me bend on one knee and asked me to marry him.  I said YES with the widest, gummiest smile I could muster. I was miffed.


 
I love proposals!I believe in the proverbial ‘Happily ever afters’, the  knighst in their shining armor, and the knee benders. Yes, I love them all. 

To let you in on an obvious secret, in my minds theater, you must know,  I’ve scripted, enacted, directed some of the most beautiful proposals that could have been  (Goosebumps!!!) .
 
From fairytales to Rom-Coms, I shamelessly know it all like the back of my hand, the juicy details to the finest ins and outs! ! Excerpts(?) The the blue jewel encrusted satin Manolo Blahnik heel which ‘Big’ used in Sex and the City to seal the deal with ‘Carrie’ ,OR  the epic proposal by Mr.McDreamy, in the notoriously famed elevator ,’I’m not gonna get down on my knee, I’m not gonna ask a question, I love you Meredith Grey and I want  to spend my rest of my life with you!’(dreamy i was!) 

 
..OR when Luke(Ed Harris) slid the perfect ring, into Isabels(Julia Roberts) dainty fingers  in the movie  Step Mom using a precariously tied knot, wowing  not just with words, but with a highly adept manoeuvre OR when Adam Sandler strummed beautiful chords to sing his way into Drew Barrymore’s  heart with 
‘I want to Grow old with you’  in the movie  The Wedding Singer.There exists so many of these timeless, magnificent  moments  in cinema and I've caught girlfriends and ahem(yours truly) watching these mementos of celluloid, over and over again, reliving every instant, taking in every word, and moping away at you had me at hello.  

 It’s is perhaps in the strangest of circumstances that we find the emotion by the name of love, romantics like me clinging on to amayy-zing moments like that make our stories for tomorrow. Needless to be said though, this month of love is not only dedicated to the fantasies we have lived through, but also to the little joys that don't hit the table topics while getting you from one day to another. To which any guy may ask, then why celebrate? Well for reassurance, the extra smile, and our next big story for tomorrow.  The small thoughts count, but that isn’t cue to dismiss the big ones now, is it? 
Happy month of love!Have  a good one.